Hotter than an otters pocket

'Do you know what I've got in my pocket?', asked Martha as we took Trotter and Lulu for a walk earlier.

'I don't know!', i replied with a casual indifference, 'what have you got in your pocket?'

All of a sudden and with no apparent warning, Martha produced a retractable pencil.

'It's quite an effective weapon', she said, 'it can get through to the skin, even through jeans'

I looked at her with an appraising eye and enquired how she knew this.

'Oh, you know, if people torment me too much in the office i stab them in the leg', she said.

'would you like to feel how painful it is?'

I took a step back and replied in the negative.