Who said romance is dead?

One day Martha decided to read a book. She stood for some time looking at the bookshelves and occasionally pulling one out to read the back cover. She took her time, as you would, carefully choosing.

Trotter stands behind her bristling and almost jumping up and down on the spot. Because Trotter hates paperbacks, not just dislikes, HATES paperbacks, you are not to read them, nor to touch them. On a bad day you can't read the paper either but he never minds a hard back....

So Martha, satisfied with her choice sits down only to have Trotter leap upon her and attack the book.

This might not have been such a messy story if Martha had not injured herself in a freak ironing accident which had bought on her 'Trotter - elbow' which in turn had left one arm completely immobile and encased in tubi grip.

Poor Trotter has lost control of his frenzied attack and is so overwrought that he starts to hump the injured arm, 'Get OFF, Get Off you dirty Dog! Screamed Marth in desperation as she couldn't shake the little blighter off! She hit him round the head with the paper back but still he humped!

Poor Marth was there for 10 minutes before he calmed down.

Poor Martha.

Poor TROTTER.